Confessions of a Liberal Puritan

I tuned into the noon-hour talk show today on my local public radio AM station (forgot what the show itself is called), even though I was furiously trying to grade a backlog of Bible papers, because I'd heard a promo during the morning news program telling me that they'd be talking about fan efforts to save "Angel".

Turns out, it was at most a 5-minute piece, nearly at the end of the hour, something called "The Unger Report," and mainly consisted of briefly questioning and/or mildly mocking the fans picketing the WB studios in California.

No hard numbers to speak of (beyond saying that "Angel"'s ratings this year had been respectable), no update or report on the efforts on the websites or the postcard-writing campaigns, or even the truck (or maybe it was a van?) some fans have hired to drive around L.A. with pro-"Angel" messages on it.

Nada. Zippo.

Just fluff, and barely above the "observe-these-strange-creatures-in-their-natural-habitat-but-don't-get-too-near-the-bars-'cause-you-never-know-what-they-might-do" zoo-coverage you sometimes see about science fiction or other fan conventions in the local news. I expected more and better from NPR, for goodness' sake!

On a lighter note, a friend sent this little tidbit to me in an e-mail (I don't know its original source or authorship), and it seemed very appropriate, considering the stresses in my life at the moment (trying to teach the Bible to my students on Mondays and Wednesdays, anthropology on a different campus on Tuesdays and Thursdays, preaching on Sundays, and trying to finish my dissertation so that someday I'll be eligible to be turned down for tenure in whatever time is left in my week)!

WHY GOD NEVER RECEIVED TENURE AT ANY UNIVERSITY:

1.. He only had one major publication.
2.. It was in Hebrew.
3.. It had no references.
4.. It wasn't published in a refereed journal.
5.. Some even doubt He wrote it himself.
6.. It may be true that He created the world, but what has He done since then?
7.. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8.. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating His results.
9.. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.
10.. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.
11.. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, He deleted them from the sample.
12.. He rarely came to class, just told the students to read the Book.
13.. Some say He had his Son teach the class.
14.. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15.. Although there were only 10 requirements, most students failed His tests.
16.. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

And for those who might be considering whether or not to see the "Hellboy" movie which opened on Friday, I offer this very positive review (spoiler-free, as far as I can tell) from my sister, who said that the main similarity between "Hellboy" and "X-Men" was that in both cases, as soon as the closing credits rolled on her first viewing, she felt the urge to immediately watch the film all over again.

As far as I'm concerned (I myself haven't been to the movies at all in the past couple of weeks -- not since I saw "The Passion of the Christ," so I think it's just taken me a while to recover from that experience), an "X-Men" movie comparison is high praise indeed, and reason enough to plan to see "Hellboy" sometime later this week.

I just got back from seeing 'Hellboy' with ['the gang'], and it was terrific. I checked out reviews from Rotten Tomatoes.com, and I agree with the many reviewers who singled out Ron Perlman for praise. ... I hope he will be able to break out of his character-actor ghetto more often based on the success of this film. It took me awhile to figure out who Ron reminded me of in his lantern-jawed make-up for this film: Burt Lancaster.

I don't agree with the critiques that labeled it derivative. I think the world can have more than one tortured hero. When I mentioned that Hellboy was compared to Wolverine in more than one review, the gang was surprised. Hellboy's angst and Wolverin's angst are coming from different places, and it just seems laborious to compare them. Well, reviewers have to say something that at least APPEARS clever.

I'd definitely compare it more to the 'Beauty and the Beast' t.v. series, which as you know, I loved. When you first see John Hurt's underground quarters in the Bureau of Paranormal Studies and Defense, you know he has just replaced Roy Dotrice. There was more than one location or set design that gave me deja vu. As for the character of H.B., he is very different from Vincent, except in situation: his looks prevent him from going out and about like a normal person, and he has to date outside his species. The only deja vu I got there was that sexy walk of Ron's as H.B. stalked the tunnels of the super-secret underground hideout.

The romantic subplot/plot (for me it was the real suspense) seemed well-timed for [our brother and his wife, part of 'the gang'] who were celebrating their anniversary. A romantic movie called 'Hellboy' -- who'd have thunk it? I don't want to give details, but it was nicely done.

I also agree with the reviewer who said that this movie owed its tone more to 'Men in Black' than to 'Batman' and other super-serious comic book movies. 'Hellboy' is less jokey, but has an air of wit and whimsy, due mainly to H.B.'s approaching his work with the blue-collar pragmatism of a plumber. I was talking about seeing it again by the time we got to the car.

With few good sci-fi movies turning up in the theatres, and few good sci-fi shows on the t.v., I was really into this. Consider it a thumbs AND toes up.

With "Wonderfalls" having followed many other shows into cancellation after an inadequate chance to prove itself, and with efforts to renew or save "Angel" apparently arousing only amusement-interest in the news media, I guess I'd better start supporting whatever good sci-fi is left on TV (at the moment, all I can think of are syndicated re-runs of BtVS, AtS, DS9, B5, etc., plus the remains of "Angel" season 5, the next season of "Stargate: SG1" this summer, and "Smallville") and at the movies.

In other words, "'Hellboy,' here I come!"