Confessions of a Liberal Puritan

A friend from Iowa forwarded this satirical 'news' item to me, tracing the Icelandic volcanic ash cloud to the producers of the television series "Lost" (a series finale idea that got a bit out of hand).

If you haven't seen this elsewhere, enjoy!

APRIL 16, 2010
VOLCANIC ASH CLOUD TURNS OUT TO BE FINALE OF LOST
PRODUCERS SET OFF EXPLOSIVE CHARGE

ICELAND (The Borowitz Report) – A gigantic ash cloud from an
Icelandic volcano that blanketed Northern Europe on Thursday and
paralyzed air travel across the continent has turned out to be part
of the finale of the television series LOST, network officials
confirmed today.

Bracing themselves for the public uproar over a special-effects
spectacle gone awry, ABC officials today attempted to explain how the
producers’ desire for a fitting ending to the increasingly
convoluted series led to an aviation nightmare.

“The producers of Lost set off a small explosive charge underneath
the Eyjafjallajokull glacier in Iceland, hoping to create a cloud of
black smoke,” said ABC spokesperson Carol Foyler. “That was
pretty much the only way they could think of to end the series.”
After the gigantic cloud of volcanic ash threatened aircraft for
miles around, “it was clear that this time they went a little too
far,” she said.

But even as ABC was taking great pains to explain how the LOST finale
ended in a volcanic eruption that cost European airlines billions of
dollars, longtime Lostfanatics were doubting the network’s story.

Tracy Klugian, 27, a web designer from Evanston, Illinois who has
seen every episode of the confusing series at least eight times
doesn’t believe that the gigantic ash cloud could possibly be the
end of the series: “For one thing, it makes too much sense.”
Mr. Klugian said he was spending all his free time looking for
alternative explanations: “I even checked out if
‘Eyjafjallajokull’ spelled backwards means anything. It
doesn’t.”

In other entertainment news, Larry King’s wife filed for divorce
after catching him sending sexy messages on his telegraph key.