Confessions of a Liberal Puritan

This update may or may not be coherent, since my latest set of symptoms (beginning yesterday morning) includes a numbness and tingling in my face and hands (doctor checked my vitals yesterday, said pulse and blood-pressure are fine, so most likely a reaction to the medications I've been on and the severe lack of sleep in the past two weeks). At any rate, the result is that until further notice, it's very difficult to use my fingers with any dexterity or strength. Just typing seems exhausting at the moment, but I wanted to share a few thoughts from my sister, while they were fresh and uppermost in my mind. [some spoilers for movie "Paycheck" at the very end.]

In an e-mail sent over the weekend, my sister put together an article she'd just read with something that happened while she was visiting me here. During our game of "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus", we 'girls' had had to decide how a male friend of mine would respond to the question: "which would you rather win: a) an Olympic gold medal; b) an Academy Award, or c) the lottery?" Those of us who knew 'Mike' (not his real name) and his fondness for the finest in computing and home entertainment gadgetry suspected that the lottery answer might actually appeal to him, but based on his admittedly impressive physique (he's an ebony god, frankly) and the fact that he's following up his Ph.D. from Vanderbilt with a post-doctoral fellowship at Harvard in a couple of months (indicating that he's more than capable of winning or achieving anything he sets his mind on), my sister argued eloquently for placing our bets on the first two answers, rather than the third. Shamefacedly, 'Mike' told us his answer was "lottery" -- that he was, in fact, much shallower than my sister gave him credit for being. And we all had a good laugh. But my sister kept 'pondering this in her heart,' apparently. So she wrote to me the following:

"I read an interesting article today called 'coddled kids'. It's about kids who have received TMPR (too much positive reinforcement) from their parents, without actually meriting it. Thank goodness we don't suffer from this. The author's hypothesis suggests that that's why all these talentless young people go on 'American Idol' only to be in shocked denial when Simon Cowell tells them they are talentless and can't carry a tune. She also suggested that George W. Bush suffers from same disorder, that despite his poor schoolmarks and business failures and lack of actual votes, he feels entitled to be president.

"She says that the self-esteem movement has backfired in some ways, and that psychologists are now telling people that 'self-esteem is a result -- not a cause -- of good performance.' ...

"One of the things I'd point out about 'American Idol' and the 'Apprentice' et. al., is that the talentless but self-infatuated people who go on there are also a victim of another American problem, the one that boosts being famous for its own sake, or doesn't distinguish between riches earned and riches handed on a platter, like the lottery.

"I've discussed that one 'Men are from Mars...' question with some people, because you have two responses which, while not being about money, imply it. Gold Medalists get paid to have their faces on cereal boxes. Venus Williams has a gold medal and a shitload of endorsement and prize money to boot, (gone are those amateur Olympians) and being given an Oscar implies excellence and future success in a lucrative business. Winning the lottery is the only fantasy scenario where one doesn't do any work for the financial gain.

"I happened to be discussing your friend's response with ['Maxine'] in the car and her 11 year old son piped in VERY pro-lottery. I found it a little disturbing that he should value money over the excellence which earns it and he seemed convinced that I was completely naive and that's what everybody wants, 'money for nothing and your chicks for free...'

"People who really love music and believe in their talent get together with a band, try to write music, and slug it out in many crappy gigs before or without ever getting the chance to get that brass recording ring. I've known a lot of these people. Without having watched the show, it seems like a lot of people who go on there are 'shortcut' people, looking for the rewards for little effort.

"I was talking about the lottery issue because I went to the Budget Cinema and saw 'Paycheck' Thursday. It was good and fun and I was very happy with the ending where after having forfeited his 92 million dollar paycheck to save the world, our hero, his girlfriend and buddy seem to be working in a nursery, doing an honest day's work growing things that make the air breatheable, when all of sudden they decipher the last clue, and discover a winning 90 million dollar lottery ticket in the bottom of the birdcage and I feel like my happy ending is shot to shit, and that they now have more money than anyone can possibly spend and our hero will probably go back to being a self-indulgent jerk and they just have way more problems than solutions. What a cop-out ending, but apparently one America wants to see (or not...this film wasn't that successful). I don't know...

"However, back to the self-esteem front, I'm not sure I totally agree with the TMPR writer about everything. Talented people lacking self-esteem might not ever give themselves a chance to be discovered. And I think self-esteem and esteem for others doesn't have to be earned but should be based on the fact that we're human beings, not special people or successful people. Maybe that's why so many people try out for these shows, somewhere deep inside they need reassurance that they matter, and in our society money and fame gives that to them. [but] Meaningless positive reinforcement doesn't have weight."

Interesting thought, no? I wonder if or how shows like "Angel" and "Buffy" (where the rewards for doing the right thing and saving the world are often intangible or actually lead to more suffering and hardship for the hero in the future) buck that trend? Did this season of "Angel" -- where the A.I. team suddenly had all the rewards of success in terms of money and prestige and power over the lives of underlings -- attempt to subvert our national preoccupation with TMPR (by showing that that way lies the road to hellishness of all sorts), or is it in some sense buying into it, giving the public what they want, the fun of seeing the heroes get the goodies?